This morning I marked 5 comments in my inbox to be deleted - and LJ deleted 900.

???????????????????

Granted that solves my problem of having 900+ entries in my inbox but that wasn't what I wanted it to do! That 900 included some lovely recent PM's & conversation from y'all I'd been saving on purpose, birthday listings, how-to advice. In fact it deleted EVERYTHING except stuff I'd red flagged as "important" - about 21 comments.

(ok so maybe the fault isn't with LJ; maybe I clicked on a box that said "delete all" without paying proper attention. I am woman enough to admit it. albeit in small font.)

Damnity damnity damn damn it.

Firstly: Thank you everyone who sent me the wonderful birthday wishes last week in the form of messages or as gifts in your journal. It really meant a lot to me, and made turning 46 a lot more fun than I'd anticipated. It was a lovely, low-key day: my sweetie took me out to the new Thai restaurant in the area we'd recently heard about; and she bought me a tin of one of my favorite teas from Harney and Sons, "Bankok" (green tea with lemongrass, ginger, vanilla and coconut flavors.) A cup of that before bed is now my nightly ritual.

If you posted birthday wishes or a gift on your journal and I have not thanked you yet, it means one thing: LJ is SCREWING UP notifications and I don't know about it. (I've gotten a grand total of one notification in the last 30 days.) I thought it was just me until I just happened to see that velvetwhip posted a complaint about it on her LJ, just happened to find a lovely birthday message and graphic that she posted for me; and then just happened to see comlodge make a remark about having trouble posting a gift banner (which is utterly gorgeous) she'd made for me, and I'm thinking, "What? What is this gift we speak of?" Then today I just happened to see kikimay's birthday graphic for me with a cap of Buffy receiving her umbrella in The Prom which gives me so many feelings, as well as several other times she name-checked me, and that's not counting the times other folks like eilowyn or kwritten have name-checked me, etc.

Folks, I'm all for "happenstance" and "serendipity" - but not on a social networking site. Not when people are making me gifts and wishing me happy birthday, or giving me free PR by referencing my posts. I want to know about this stuff because to NOT stop by and say "THANK YOU" is just plain damn rude, IMO. That said, I know that children are starving in Africa - starving all over the world in fact - and I'm sitting her whining like a priviledged American white gal. (Which I happen to be, but nevermind.)

If kerkevik_2014 hadn't PM'd me about a completely charming and sexy Tara/Faith drabble he wrote for me, I never would have known about it. Sweet, sexy, taking-command Tara is pure catnip to me - and being the gentle guide for a suddenly-shy and insecure Faith? OH YES PLEASE.  It's easy to forget that Tara possessed a core of strength and confidence even if we rarely saw it before S6. Remember, she is the one who pursued Willow - NOT the other way around. I was a just-out lesbian in the '90's, just before the show came on tv and I know how much courage that would have taken at that time (and probably still does.)

SO - if you've mentioned me or have made a prezzie for me, or just something you think I might like to see, please don't be shy about PM'ing me until this notification nonsense gets straightened out.

SECONDLY: comlodge told me that the aforementioned Buffy tribute banner she made for my birthday was inspired by my recent "happy birthday Buffy" post and that in itself is the best present. If I can make someone else see Buffy and her world through my eyes even a little, not by shouting or arguing or arm-twisting, but simply by loving her and sharing what she means to me, then that makes me incredibly happy. comlodge's banner reflects what so much of what I love about Buffy - the girl, the woman, the warrior; daughter, sister, friend and lover. Her's is an incredible journey.

Speaking of incredible journeys: kwritten posted an insanely gorgeous Buffy, Anya, Willow, Dawn/Faith fic, "Oh, You're Here Too?" set immediately post-Chosen. Anya offers Buffy friendship and solace after the battle. Not AU. She wrote it for a prompt from kikimay but it reflects so much about how I see Buffy in that immediate period about 1000X better than I could hope to. It's a short story but it takes the reader on a complete journey that feels novelistic, in a series of short scenes: from Buffy's trauma and dissociation, the fatigue and inability to process everything after the battle in the Hellmouth, to a place that feels "warm, (un)finished, (in)complete" as Buffy contemplates the "the unknown future" before her, in the company of beloved friends and family.

The other day I finally decided to check out that "My Guests" function on LJ and realized, dear goddess, I'm becoming one of THOSE people.  A Stats Hussy.  (As my friend Lady M told me years ago, "A whore does it for money, a hussy does it for free.")  Not that there's anything wrong with that, or anything.

How do I create box of link on my LJ and DW pages (linking back to one another or any other site)?  I've looked in settings on both and no dice.  (Or is there a tutorial-type website that covers a lot of these questions?)

At some point I will get back to those meta on Anne and dopplegangers in the 'verse.  I swear I will.

So I went with Woodcut Winter (because you were dying to know that, right?)  I almost went with Weston Grey, which it turns out is the one gabrielleabelle used; I have a weird thing about not wanting to use the same font I associate with someone else's well-known/well-traveled (in my head at least) LJ.  And I wasn't sure about the times-roman style font.  Carson, Minimalist and Unity all had very clean (if slightly cold) graphics and readable ariel font.  But I've only seen one other person use Woodcut in my little corner of LJ acquaintance, and it has a similar warmth and elegance to Weston.

And I love history and the antique enough for the design to still appeal to me (although my preoccupation is more 19th century, specifically the last quarter of the century, the fin de siecle, than the 18th century.)  

Thank you kikimay, pocochina, and readerjane for your recommendations. (I told you I know how to waste time.  Lots and lots of it.)