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"You're standing at the mouth of Hell. And it's about to open up." *
***
"I'm beyond tired. I'm beyond scared.
I'm standing on the mouth of Hell and it's going to swallow me whole. And it'll choke on me." **
* Joss Whedon
** Marti Noxon & Douglas Petrie
** Marti Noxon & Douglas Petrie
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Date: 2013-05-01 07:17 pm (UTC)Oh, ok!
Really? That is... slightly odd. .
I have seen that in a lot of fics and conversations: the perception that Tara is ok with Buffy being with Spike, by virtue of the comments you mention, and I think also in comparison to the other Scoobies. Or at least to Xander, I don't recall Willow being judgemental of Spike in the same way that Xander is, but Xander has some "masculinity issues" that could sink the Titanic. & this is related to the Spike & Tara have a special bond trope shows up a lot: Tara defends Spike in front of the other Scoobs, Spike begrudgingly admits that she's a "bit of all right" or something. Joyce is portrayed similarly; because she's respectful & sometimes friendly to Spike & treats him like a person, is interpreted to mean she'd be cool with him being Buffy's boyfriend. I don't think that the text supports that. if she were alive in S7 she MIGHT be ok with Buffy and Spike being together; I'm certain she would not be cool with their relationship in S6. Then again if Joyce had been alive, the last two seasons would probably have been very different.
I think Tara & Joyce are used in some circles to claim the superiority of "their vampire" over the other; I'm not sure how much if any of that is genuine interest in Joyce and Tara themselves. Although there are the Tara/Spike shippers so I'll assume genuine interest there. I don't think I've ever actually read a story that shipped B/S/T but I'd be curious to read your's.
So I'm actually okay with completely out-of-the-blue Buffy pairings, as long as they interest me and don't gross me out. Buffy/Wesley is surprisingly a favorite.
I read a Buffy/Charlie Dunn story once that I really liked. I noticed you have Buffy/Wesley crossed out in your comment, 'splainy? I've read a couple of B/W stories and they were ok, except for one that goes AU after the end of S6 that I found a bit uncomfortable and degrading to Buffy. I got the feeling the author didn't like Buffy, and her behavior made no sense to me. So I haven't read any of that pairing since.
just, some of her actions definitely make me go "uhhh". The way she treated Tara is among those.
Oh yeah, I won't try to excuse or condone her actions either, any more than Buffy's or Spike's or Angel's or...anybody's basically. YMMV. Speaking of Willow I was watching bits of Earshot and surprised how much foreshadowing of S6 there is in it; I was comparing it overall to Normal Again but there's a scene where Willow interrogates Jonathan as a suspect & goes on about fantasies of control & being noticed; then later she says "That slippery little weasel I had him in my grasp!" OMG: cue Dark Willow. It's brilliant; all those moments in the early seasons that seemed cute or inconsequential end up having so much weight.
The abuse going on there is definitely mutual, and I think that's an important point because a lot of people are quick to wholly blame one or the other.
IKR? BTW I hope I wasn't getting too triggery for you mentioning my partner & myself; it's not a horrid relationship by any means; there's just a dynamic there & in my mom's relationships that help me understand what happens on BtVS; things make sense to me for specific reasons; I don't have a lot of academic theory to hide behind because it's mostly very real world stuff. I probably need to be more careful though.
We all make mistakes, though, and unintenionally offend other people; I've done it often enough.
Yep. Then I'll feel bad afterward; & hopefully I can apologize & it'll all be cool; most times it is. But there have been other times-have you ever been left feeling at the end of a conversation, WTF just happened? Not sure if you were crazy and irrational or the other person was? I hate that feeling.
Describing my own reaction. You didn't offend me at all, and I'm sorry if it came off that way!
No worries! I tend to go back and forth I think between oversensitive and not sensitive enough; and sometimes it's hard for me to read between the lines, so I'll default to "my bad". But that is such old, old training in me that it's a habit, unfortunately.