The Earth Her Body - Fic by La Noyee, (and random thoughts about the women of the 'verse) (1/?)

[red_satin_doll]

ETA: Additional screencaps added below cut - which has also been added. (Post in haste, repent at leisure.)

Take a Moment: by   lanoyee. Gen, Buffy, Tara, Dawn. A "deleted scene" , post-"Grave"; Buffy bids a friend good-bye. Spare, elegant and melancholy, it's a scene I wish had been in the show.  One of the things I love best about BtVS is how unsentimental it is generally, but sometimes, what I want and what I need are one and the same; no one else can determine that for me. This story gives me both, and it honors one of the most overlooked friendships in the Buffyerse: Buffy and Tara.

lanoyee  recently began transferring some of her female-centric & Buffy-centric meta from her tumblr to her LJ because I begged at my request. In our conversations about one of our favorite shared subjects, the interrelationships of the women on BtVS, the same words kept coming up over and over: overlooked, underestimated, underappreciated, etc. When it comes to Buffy especially, her relationships with other women generate a lot less ink, as far as I can tell, than her relationships with the men in her life; it's easy to forget how central Joyce, Dawn, Willow, Faith etc are to Buffy's story, to her heart. Spike and Angel may be in her heart; Joyce and Dawn are her heart, they are her blood. And yet at the same time the show demonstrates that importance of "not in blood but in bond" relationships, to quote Kikimay's recent comment.


"Take a Moment" was written shortly after a conversation lanoyee & I had about Buffy & Tara in particular, i.e. Why doesn't anyone talk about their relationship? About Tara's role in Buffy's story? Because it's not something I need to fanwank out of thin air, or squint to see: It's right there onscreen; they have a connection to one another that Buffy never shares with Anya, or at least until "Selfless" brings the "Xander's Lie" arc full circle. pocochina thankfully mentions their connection in her 2011 meta character study of Tara, summing it up in quick, vivid strokes in just two paragraphs.

I'd call Buffy & Tara my OTF (one true friendship) except that's bullshit: aside from Buffy being my favorite character in the 'verse (and possibly in fiction, period) when it comes to this show, I may prefer certain things but I don't "OT_" anything. But FUFAW (Favorite Underappreciated Friendship Among Women) is pretty unwieldy, and sound like either a disease or something two cats would do in an alley.

Tara may not get a lot of time on the show, and she and Buffy rarely interact directly but she plays a key or essential role in some of the best episodes of the series, and when she does, she not only sings, she soars: "Hush", which both mirrors and flips Buffy and Willow's first encounters in "WTTH"; "Who are You", in which she is the only character to realize that Faith isn't really Buffy, and she's never even met Buffy before; "Restless", as a dream guide to Buffy her connection to Dawn, as a sister, becomes explicit; "Family" begins with Buffy verbally committing to protect Dawn from Glory after learning that Dawn isn't "real", and ends with Buffy and Dawn protecting Tara from the Maclays and naming her as one of their own: "Who do you think you are?" / "We're family."  (I recently rewatched that episode waiting for a conversation between Buffy and Tara at the end at Tara's birthday party, and was shocked to realize it wasn't in the episode at all, but rather from snowpuppies's  fic "Here Comes the Sun" )
Speaking the words: "family" "sisters" "Summers blood" makes the commitment as physical and as real as mixing her own blood with Dawn's in BT.

Not in blood alone, but in bond.

The relationships between the women of the Buffyverse aren't an afterthought, something set to the side, they are absolutely central to it; and unlike most tv and movies shows I grew up with, the women of the Buffyverse don't relate only to the men, who in contrast enjoy rich friendships with one another. (Remember the popularity of the "buddy movie" esp in the 1980's?) That, for me, is one of the strengths of the Buffyverse. The women matter, and they matter to one another, as literal and metaphorical mothers, sisters, daughters, rivals, friends, and allies. They love, and choose to love, even when it's painful and difficult to do so.

And this may be behind my frustration or impatience with Angel, Riley and Giles. Yes, they have to leave, yes I get it, blah blah bitty blah. They can't stand the "fire" of love, so they get out of the kitchen, out of "women's space" literally and figuratively. I could devote an entire meta just to "Joyce's kitchen" as symbol of the Mother Principal, of Mater. The room where Buffy fights to protect Joyce in "Angel" and "Ted", where they have their worst fight in "Becoming Pt 2", where Joyce reaffirms her admiration and pride in Buffy in "Helpless", is also the room we associate with Tara's pancakes, and Spike fights for Buffy in "Touched". (The Mother Principle is not about literal gender.) It means something. They "chose" Mater and reaffirm the importance of love - raw, real, and messy love in all it's aspects, not the illusion of "romance". They bear witness to one another: you're important. You matter. I love you. I believe in you. Yes you fucked up, but you can do better next time. I understand you - or maybe I don't, but I can offer you comfort.

It's why we don't see Angel and Riley in the final battle in "Chosen" nor should we. It's why Giles absolutely has to "bend his knee" to the Warrior of the People, the Queen - and thank the stars that she is a benevolent one - if he expects to stand next to Buffy at the end.  Or rather, behind her, in the final scene.

And it's one reason - of many - why Tara's absence in "Chosen" hurts so deeply; she earned the right to be there. Not as Willow's lover, not as a "perfect, faultless human being" (which she isn't, despite the tendency to canonize her as saint), and not even as Buffy's friend but as a powerful woman in her own right.

If I don't go into the politics overmuch here it's because I have a LOT more to say on the subject and am saving it for the moment; but also because it's dominated the discussion re: Tara for over ten years. Rage or silence and little in between the two. If I focus on her death, then I fail to celebrate her life, and it's worth celebrating. Her very existence as the first three-dimensional lesbian character in a realistic lesbian relationship is worth celebrating. And deserves a much better legacy than shameful silence and lack of any such characters that still exists  - or rather, doesn't exist - in US television ten years later.


As long as we share her story she'll never lack for mourners and lovers, but if we fail to do so then she "dies", utterly and completely.

Comments

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

I finally had a chance to read this and thought it was a very well-thought out look at Tara, and yeah, I agree, it would've been nice to see more of her.

[red-satin-doll.livejournal.com]

I admit I didn't fall in love with Tara until S6 - and sometimes I'm not sure if it's because of the characterization, the lack of screen time, or Amber's performance in S4 & 5, which I really need to rewatch with fresh eyes. But when I fell for her - WHOA, I fell hardcore.

I really think ME totally dropped the ball with Tara on so many levels. The fact that there's still a dire lack of lesbian characters on american tv and lesbianism is STILL used as a plot point or a joke (including on Sarah's new series, The Crazy Ones) makes it that much worse IMO. UGH.

Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting! Your Keanu icon is giving me the giggles - it's just perfect.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Keanu's mah Sekrit Boyfriend - I had more pictures of him up in my office than of my husband, back when I was married. :D

I think ME dropped the ball with various things throughout the series. I did like that Amber made her decision that she wanted to leave and made Joss upset because it wrecked his storyline. :D

[red-satin-doll.livejournal.com]

I had more pictures of him up in my office than of my husband, back when I was married.

Did your husband have anything to say about it, or was he cool? I can't help notice the past tense on the "married" bit. (My sweetie used to make comments about the Moulin Rouge/Nicole Kidman pics I had, so I took to hiding them.)

I did like that Amber made her decision that she wanted to leave and made Joss upset because it wrecked his storyline. :D

She didn't want to leave (are we talking about SR?) but she definitely upset him when she refused to reappear as the First in CWDP because she was thinking about how much it would hurt fans who were already traumatized (I don't think that's too strong a word) and I have SO MUCH respect for her for just that. Amber is an awesome lady. She "got" how important Tara was and Joss didn't. End o' story.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

He was vaguely annoyed about it, as well as the fact my car was named after Keanu, but it was just something snippy, especially after I got him some Michelle Pfeiffer pictures to put up. :D And yeah, he's an ex, but it wasn't related to K.R.

Oh, I had understand it was Amber's decision to leave. So I have all that wrong.

[red-satin-doll.livejournal.com]

Admittedly I was never a big Keanu Reeves fan - until Something's Got to Give with Diane Keaton and I adored his character: a young doctor who is a fan of her work and values her intelligence and talent, and is totally comfortable with the fact that he's younger than her and she's a decidedly "mature" woman? Oh yes please. And it's not played as a "joke" - she not's called a cougar ie "on the prowl" (I HATE HATE HATE that term used for older women/younger men.) She didn't have to wait for him to "grow up" or drag him kicking and screaming from delayed adolescence because he was already an adult. He was charming and courteous and I wanted to clone him - and I'm a lesbian. (Actually he probably struck a chord with me in part because I'm likewise much younger than my partner.)

Which meant of course she ends up with the Jack Nicolson character. *pouts*

I had understand it was Amber's decision to leave.

Most of this is what I've read elsewhere (including ten years ago): The Dark Willow arc was planned by Joss almost from the beginning, based on the Jean Grey/Dark Phoenix arc in the X-Men comics. Oz (Seth Green) was originally supposed to die in S4 and Willow go dark then but then he decided to leave the show. "Tara" was only supposed to be on for a handful of episodes and then be killed off; but she and Willow/Tara were so popular it took the writers/producers by surprise (I guess they were all heterosexual?) and they kept her on much longer. They were the first and only realistic, long-term same-sex (lesbian) couple on American tv, so, duh.

I've read that Joss Whedon sat down with Amber Busch, who played Warren (and was also Amber's boyfriend) that Adam was going to "kill his girlfriend" onscreen - and said this in front of Amber. I'm sure Joss thought he was being funny. Maybe he was nervous about killing off Tara and trying to deflect. (the more I read about Joss the more he reminds me of Xander in that way - not as funny as he thinks he is, and sometimes his "jokes" come off as insensitive or just inappropriate.)

There's a couple of links to interviews with Amber at the Whedonesque site (which I'm not a member of) and certainly a lot more can be found on the internet, but this has to do with the idea of Amber returning for S7, not leaving in S6:
http://whedonesque.com/comments/1564
But it was horrible how she died, and the first time there had ever been anything really violent like that on Buffy . I don’t think it was that [producer] Joss [Whedon] was conscious of the lesbian death stereotype when he did was he did. He always told us that Willow and Tara were based on friends of his and his wife’s. He actually wanted me to come back, but as a bad Tara. It was my choice not to do that. It would have hurt too many people.

I was surprised at the comments on the Whedonesque forum that outright accused Benson of assuming the fans were too "dumb" to realize that The First and Tara were not the same character, when that was not her point AT ALL. (She was thinking of the people who would be most affected by the situation? Silly girl */end sarcasm*) I wouldn't want her - or anyone - to do anything they were not 100% comfortable with emotionally for the sake of a paycheck.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

I used to make it a point to see every one of Keanu's movies but I don't like romantic movies (like, at all - I'm very much a 'guy' in my movie choices - I want chases, explosions, and (gun)fights, and preferably, no romantic relationships, particularly ones that happen in the movie over what seems to be a very short amount of time), and I think the last ones of his I saw was "A Walk in the Clouds", "The Matrix: II", and the lawyer one*, which I can't remember the title of any more. I do find it amusing that Joss Whedon rewrote the script for Speed after Keanu said, "This is good, make it better". I thought after I found that out, I could see some of Whedon's humor in it.

I'm not surprised about the Dark Willow thing mirroring Jean Grey/Dark Phoenix, considering the fanboy Whedon is. That was another thing that kind of bothered me; yeah, I get the whole 'absolute power' fable, but the way it was shown, like it was a drug she couldn't resist? That really bothered me. I had a hard time with the most stable character in the series going evil.