My lady-love and I are still camping in the front yard; hopefully we'll start the move into a new apartment on the 2nd (when the other tenants move out.) I put up a tarp over the tent to protect us from the rain BY MYSELF for the first time - and it's lasted just fine, thank you *pats self on back*

Counting blessings: Today I was finally able, after many hours of frustration, to get ahold of someone from the state Department of Social Services about some benefits I'd been receiving that had been cut off at the beginning of the month - and within an hour she determined that my benefits had been cut off without cause, and restored them. Every once in a while someone restores my faith in humanity.

Have been listening to some new-to-us cassette tapes while I clean house during the day in the aftermath of the fire. I cannot tell you HOW MUCH I've missed having internet access - to bitch, to snark, to squee, the whole nine fandom yards. Listening to music makes me feel at least a little human again, especially Joan Armatrading. I've played her over and over the last couple of days: "Me, Myself and I," "Willow" "Love and Affection" but especially "The Weakness in Me." She just hits the spot every time.

But today I put on Nanci Griffith's Lonestar State of Mind and during the last song "There's a Light Beyond the Woods (Mary Margaret)" I started sobbing and I have no idea why. Is it the notion of a life-long friendship since childhood which the song describes and which I've never experienced? The intense lonliness of this experience after the fire, even if I'm experiencing it with someone else? Disappointment at a life unlived (mine)?

Or perhaps my sweetie got it right when she said "Maybe it was just time to cry."

I miss being able to just check out and have a little fandom fun here on LJ to take my mind off things. And I miss chatting with my friends here and keeping up with everything that's going on. (People say LJ fandom is dead? Try going away from it for several days involuntarily then realizing the amount of stuff you'll never be able to catch up on - it doesn't looks so very dead from that perspective!) Oh well....This too shall pass.