There are symbolic mother figures (Buffy, Tara) but every mother figure in the verse that I know of except Buffy and Drusilla are dead by the end of btvs or ats.

Interesting. So do you at Drusilla as mother figure? I've never seen her like that. (To me she's a daughter figure and a very disturbing one.)

Buffy is a mother figure herself, true, and Joyce dies (and she doesn't seem really connected in the first seasons, when she doesn't know about the slayer-thingy) But I really think it's more about age than gender - in this case, because in general movies it's also about gender - because all the father figures in BtVS pretty much ... suck. Xander's father is terrible, Hank's absent and Willow's dad doesn't seem to exist. Plus we get Angelus and the Master who are, at least to me, the creepiest father figures EVER. Even Giles makes some serious mistakes and he's the father figure for Buffy but not much for Xander or Dawn. I really think it's a general bad view of parental figures. (But I TOTALLY agree with the issue about race. Seriously: Kendra, Jenny, Nikki ... all the people who aren't white are also disposable)

Gingerbread makes me think also about politics. Not only the persecution against homosexual which - in my country - is still a huge problem, but also the politics against immigrants and other parts of the country and different people in general. If you happen to read or see something about the latest developments in Italian politics you could see ... a disturbing analogy?
So, yes, it feels so real.