It's all about taking back what was originally yours and even if the show doesn't really get that - the power comes from the rape, something external - in fanfics we can do it. Can we?

ABSOLUTELY!

This conversation has inspired some thinky-thoughts - namely, the connection between the way the spell is undone in the comics, and the treatment of Joyce, Sheila and the parents' group (MOO) in Gingerbread. It's the only time we see Joyce in a public function (although she runs a gallery and certainly deals with "the public" on a daily basis); but this is one of the few times in the show we see how powerful she can be in her own right. (Hitting Spike with the axe in School Hard is another!)

But she's bespelled - and ends up nearly killing her own daughter. I think the show was taking MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) and other groups as a template or inspiration, but the episode displays a fear of female power, of women stepping forward in the public spotlight to create change. The show (Joss) prefers Joyce as a private person. The episode shows women banding together as something threatening, something dangerous. And I think we see that play out in the comics.

Joss says he wanted to make a show about strong women, and about a man who "isn't afraid of strong women, and in fact is turned on by them" (I think he meant Xander? Whatever.) And I guess that's how he wants to see himself. But he's more like Riley - wants to believe he's not afraid of "strong women" so long as they behave themselves, or use their power in "appropriate" ways, don't step out of line too far, and are young and nubile. (Maggie Walsh is a powerful woman, and look what happens to her.)

So there's definitely a double-standard going on here!